For the past 3 months we were a Safe Family for KK and Chuchie. It came up when I saw a post on The Table (our church's social networking site) about hosting these two children. My usual routine is to glance at the posts and then swipe over to the next app to see what else will keep me entertained for the next few unoccupied minutes. But, this post caught my eye. The kids were students at my school. Immediately I got the wild idea that John and I could do this... we could do it! I forwarded the post to my husband and googled "Safe Families." After praying and weighing the cost, we decided to go ahead and complete the training and application process to become a Safe Family.
Only about 2 weeks later, Kayshawn and Imani walked through our door with their suitcase and a Little Caesar's Pizza. We sat down for dinner, and began to imagine what the next months would be like--who are these children? What do they think about us? Are they nervous? Do they like vegetables (no, they don't!)?
I remember the first week, we asked Kayshawn, "Do you know who Jesus is?" He said, "Yeah...he's the guy who gives you food." John and I shared a glance and went on making our first smoothie with the kids. That night we opened up to the first chapter of the Jesus Storybook Bible and began to share with them about who God is, what he has done, and how he sent a Rescuer for us. We were still filled with anticipation, wondering what God was going to do in the next weeks. We said good night and then talked for hours about first impressions. How did that go? Was that a good bedtime routine? Should we read two books every night? Her smile is precious. He seems quiet. She seems shy. He ate a lot of pizza.Over the next couple of weeks we settled into a routine of school, homework, meal, play time, bath time, bed time. The weekends were filled with fun--bouncing around to see different friends and family. My favorite weekend was spent in Walker, MN where we stayed at Chase on the Lake. We were able to go bowling and swimming with the kids...for hours. I am still surprised that neither of them cracked the wooden bowling lane...literally the ball just dropped from their hands in the general direction of the pins. :o) There was also a lot of emotion. I remember the first night they both cried--saying how they missed mom. Their sobs were hard to stomach. We hugged and I reassured them this was temporary--mom loves them--it's not their fault.
As I try to summarize our time together, the things that come to mind are my quiet conversations with Kayshawn. Our first time at church, Pastor John Piper was preaching via video on a big screen... Kayshawn leaned over and asked, "is that God?" :o) There were several more conversations we shared... about not stealing, about loving and protecting your sister, and working hard for things. I loved watching John demonstrate to him what a man should be like: loving, selfless, a provider, protector, strong, wise, and centered on Jesus.
Imani is a cuddle bug. She loves attention, and loves being the boss. "No, Kayshawn...that's not how you ______." Her smile and little dance can steal your heart. She is so willing to give affection and ready to receive it. Every night after the Bible and tucking her in, she rubbed my ear, pulled me in close and while her thumb was still in her mouth, she said... "Sawa, can I ask you a question?" Yes... "Can you sing me a lil song?" So for nearly one hundred nights we sang to her... "Jesus loves me, this I know, for the Bible tells me so..." One of my favorite memories is when I heard her sing the entire song herself while playing with her dolls.The hardest parts for John and I were a number of things. It was like someone held up a mirror and revealed even more of our own selfishness that marriage hadn't uncovered yet. Communication. Expectations. Discipline. Chores. Laundry. Dishes. God worked in our lives in more ways that I can probably articulate at this time. Mainly, we know that he has revealed to us the beauty of our own adoption into his family... how God loves us enough to make us his children, despite our depravity and disobedience. He is just, and gracious--what a good Father.
When we began to tell others about having KK and Chuchie stay with us, so many people said--"wow, you are a good person!" or "wow, you are much better than I was at your age." Several nights we debriefed with each other about that comment. If we were to have the opportunity again to respond to you, we would say something like this...
Sara: "No...no... I am not good. I have spent most of my life pretending I am good... but I am not good. The only good that comes from me is what God has done in my heart and in my life. Jesus is good. He lived a sinless life and died so that I might live and not have to pay the penalty for my sin. I spent too long believing that I was good--and really, my belief was ultimately pride. God has been gracious to me, I cannot help but to love Kayshawn and Imani."John: "No...no... I am not good. I have spent most of my life not being good... breaking commandments...I am not good. The only good that comes from me is what God has done in my heart and in my life. Jesus is good. He lived a sinless life and died so that I might live and not have to pay the penalty for my sin. I spent too long trying to find pleasure in a hundred other things than God--and really, I was my own god. God has been gracious to me, I cannot help but to love Kayshawn and Imani."
